Friday, January 25, 2013

My Family...My Love.

You don't choose your family. They are God's gift to you, as you are to them.
~Desmond Tutu

So Blessed.

Thursday, January 24, 2013

Going back to work...

Going back to work after maternity leave was the hardest thing I have ever had to do.  EVER! I had the best 12 weeks with my sweet baby girl.  I am so lucky that she decided to make her appearance the day that I went on maternity leave, so I really got a full 12.5 weeks with her.  Before I had her, I told myself that I wasn't going to do anything but hold my baby during my time with her at home.  And my husband can promise you that I did just that.  I cherish that time I got to spend with her 24/7 more than anything.  The bond that we have developed is just incredible and I am so blessed that I was able to stay home with her that long.  I couldn't have done it without an understanding and supportive husband and for that I am so very thankful.

Those 12 weeks sure flew by!  They went way too fast.  It seems like just yesterday that I was being wheeled back for a c-section after 19 hours of labor.  I avoided the thought of going back to work for a long time...pretty much up until the night before.  We had arranged for her to attend a daycare near our work and then I never thought another thing about it.  Andrew also volunteered to stay home with her the first week I went back to make the transition a little easier for me. 

The night before I went back, I was a complete mess.  I couldn't stop the tears no matter how hard I tried.  How in the world was I going to leave my baby girl?  I think I woke up crying the next morning.  It was so so so hard.  I know she was in good hands, but I don't feel like anyone knows her quite like I do.  I know her cries, what she wants, when shes tired, when she is hungry, etc.  I am her mother, I should be the one taking care of her.  Leaving her with anyone else just didnt seem right and never will. 

The first week was a short one, only 3 days, thank goodness!  Andrew brought her up to work to see me every day which helped.  That week I saw a lot of sick kids with RSV/ bueno...especially since some of those kids went to the daycare we were going to take her to.  She was supposed to start the following week.  She didn't.  I had a COMPLETE meltdown about it.  My poor husband probably still thinks I am crazy about it.  Thankfully my mom was able to come watch her for a week so that I could "try" to mentally prepare myself for daycare.  How do you mentally prepare yourself to drop your most precious gift off with a complete stranger to take care of?  How??? 

I couldn't do it.  I still can't do it.  We were so blessed to have my mom come watch her last week and this week and next Andrews mom is watching her.  So thankful!! 

We are currently in the process of looking for a nanny to help out.  I don't know how I am going to do that either...but its better than risking her getting sick with the awfulness that this winter has brung with it.  The thought of her getting the flu or RSV terrifies me!  Probably because I am a pediatrician and know way too much...this is where my job really stinks!  I am so scared of her getting sick or anything else happening to her for that matter. 

I've been told going to work gets doesn't.  I am learning how to cope slowly, but it is never ever going to be easy to leave my baby in the care of someone else for 10 hours a day 5 days a week.  Never. 

She is a stubborn little girl...must get that from her daddy ;)  She absolutely hates taking the bottle.  She cries a lot when she is eating from it..poor baby.  It's so sad.  I just pray that we can find the right person to take care of her who will be patient with her and love her almost as much as we do. 

Saturday, January 5, 2013

Lo - Three Months Old

Lolo Bear,

I find myself saying this every week, but how in the world are you 3 months old already (January 5)?!?  My oh my how time is flying.  I seriously need it to slow down!  You are getting so big!  You weigh 13 pounds already, that is double your birth weight, crazy!  You love to eat!  You are taking a bottle better for daddy...sometimes.  You are a stubborn little girl, just like your mommy. :)  This past month you have really started to show your cute little personality.  You smile sooo much. You are also laughing out loud.  You first did it on January 2 for me when I came home from my first day back at work.  I was crying because I missed you so much and you started giggling.  Sweetest. Sound. Ever.  I think you did it to make me feel better. ;)  You love it when your daddy talks to you on your changing table and love it when we talk to you first thing in the morning after you have woken up.  You are so happy in the morning!  Your smile is the cutest and I especially love it when you scrunch your nose up too.  You have become a great little sleeper.  For the past month you have been sleeping through the night!  You love your daily naps, you still take 3. 

You found your hands at the beginning of this month and love sucking on them, especially when you are telling me you are hungry...its so cute :)  You kick your legs like crazy, and love to "play" the piano on your activity mat.  You still HATE tummy time, but have gotten so strong and are able to hold your neck up so well. 

I had to go back work January 2nd and leaving you is the hardest thing I have ever done.  I'm so thankful you have such a good daddy to take care of you for a few days to make the transition of daycare a little easier. 

I didn't think I could love you any more than I did the first day I met you, but I love you more and more every day!  You are the light of our lives sweet girl!  I don't know what we ever did without you. 

Wednesday, January 2, 2013

50 Rules for Dads of Daughters

So blessed that my baby has such a great daddy! I have no doubts that he will do every single one of these.

*I got this from the blog
1. Love her mom. Treat her mother with respect, honor, and a big heaping spoonful of public displays of affection. When she grows up, the odds are good she’ll fall in love with and marry someone who treats her much like you treated her mother. Good or bad, that’s just the way it is. I’d prefer good.
2. Always be there. Quality time doesn’t happen without quantity time. Hang out together for no other reason than just to be in each other’s presence. Be genuinely interested in the things that interest her. She needs her dad to be involved in her life at every stage. Don’t just sit idly by while she adds years to her life… add life to her years.
3. Save the day. She’ll grow up looking for a hero. It might as well be you. She’ll need you to come through for her over and over again throughout her life. Rise to the occasion. Red cape and blue tights optional.
4. Savor every moment you have together. Today she’s crawling around the house in diapers, tomorrow you’re handing her the keys to the car, and before you know it, you’re walking her down the aisle. Some day soon, hanging out with her old man won’t be the bees knees anymore. Life happens pretty fast. You better cherish it while you can.
5. Pray for her. Regularly. Passionately. Continually.
6. Buy her a glove and teach her to throw a baseball. Make her proud to throw like a girl… a girl with a wicked slider.
7. She will fight with her mother. Choose sides wisely.
8. Go ahead. Buy her those pearls.
9. Of course you look silly playing peek-a-boo. You should play anyway.
10. Enjoy the wonder of bath time.
11. There will come a day when she asks for a puppy. Don’t over think it. At least one time in her life, just say, “Yes.”
12. It’s never too early to start teaching her about money. She will still probably suck you dry as a teenager… and on her wedding day.
13. Make pancakes in the shape of her age for breakfast on her birthday. In a pinch, donuts with pink sprinkles and a candle will suffice.
14. Buy her a pair of Chucks as soon as she starts walking. She won’t always want to wear matching shoes with her old man.
15. Dance with her. Start when she’s a little girl or even when she’s a baby. Don’t wait until her wedding day.
16. Take her fishing. She will probably squirm more than the worm on your hook. That’s OK.
17. Learn to say no. She may pitch a fit today, but someday you’ll both be glad you stuck to your guns.
18. Tell her she’s beautiful. Say it over and over again. Someday an animated movie or “beauty” magazine will try to convince her otherwise.
19. Teach her to change a flat. A tire without air need not be a major panic inducing event in her life. She’ll still call you crying the first time it happens.
20. Take her camping. Immerse her in the great outdoors. Watch her eyes fill with wonder the first time she sees the beauty of wide open spaces. Leave the iPod at home.
21. Let her hold the wheel. She will always remember when daddy let her drive.
22. She’s as smart as any boy. Make sure she knows that.
23. When she learns to give kisses, she will want to plant them all over your face. Encourage this practice.
24. Knowing how to eat sunflower seeds correctly will not help her get into a good college. Teach her anyway.
25. Letting her ride on your shoulders is pure magic. Do it now while you have a strong back and she’s still tiny.
26. It is in her nature to make music. It’s up to you to introduce her to the joy of socks on a wooden floor.
27. If there’s a splash park near your home, take her there often. She will be drawn to the water like a duck to a puddle.
28. She will eagerly await your return home from work in the evenings. Don’t be late.
29. If her mom enrolls her in swim lessons, make sure you get in the pool too. Don’t be intimidated if there are no other dads there. It’s their loss.
30. Never miss her birthday. In ten years she won’t remember the present you gave her. She will remember if you weren’t there.
31. Teach her to roller skate. Watch her confidence soar.
32. Let her roll around in the grass. It’s good for her soul. It’s not bad for yours either.
33. Take her swimsuit shopping. Don’t be afraid to veto some of her choices, but resist the urge to buy her full-body beach pajamas.
34. Somewhere between the time she turns three and her sixth birthday, the odds are good that she will ask you to marry her. Let her down gently.
35. She’ll probably want to crawl in bed with you after a nightmare. This is a good thing.
36. Few things in life are more comforting to a crying little girl than her father’s hand. Never forget this.
37. Introduce her to the swings at your local park. She’ll squeal for you to push her higher and faster. Her definition of “higher and faster” is probably not the same as yours. Keep that in mind.
38. When she’s a bit older, your definition of higher and faster will be a lot closer to hers. When that day comes, go ahead… give it all you’ve got.
39. Holding her upside down by the legs while she giggles and screams uncontrollably is great for your biceps. WARNING: She has no concept of muscle fatigue.
40. She might ask you to buy her a pony on her birthday. Unless you live on a farm, do not buy her a pony on her birthday. It’s OK to rent one though.
41. Take it easy on the presents for her birthday and Christmas. Instead, give her the gift of experiences you can share together.
42. Let her know she can always come home. No matter what.
43. Remember, just like a butterfly, she too will spread her wings and fly some day. Enjoy her caterpillar years.
44. Write her a handwritten letter every year on her birthday. Give them to her when she goes off to college, becomes a mother herself, or when you think she needs them most.
45. Learn to trust her. Gradually give her more freedom as she gets older. She will rise to the expectations you set for her.
46. When in doubt, trust your heart. She already does.
47. When your teenage daughter is upset, learning when to engage and when to back off will add years to YOUR life. If you succeed in doing this, tell me how.
48. Ice cream covers over a multitude of sins. Know her favorite flavor.
49. This day is coming soon. There’s nothing you can do to be ready for it. The sooner you accept this fact, the easier it will be.
50. Today she’s walking down the driveway to get on the school bus. Tomorrow she’s going off to college. Don’t blink.